Of course, you can't just walk to a stream and start chugging because bacteria and other creepy-crawlies contaminating most sources of water can make you sick in no time. The resulting diarrhea will dehydrate you so fast you can actually expire from drinking the live-saving fluid. You just need to purify the stuff! There are many ways to do this, from water-purification pumps, special tablets to boiling it for several minutes or evaporating it. Make yourself an expert in at least two of these methods and always be prepared. Having a canteen or a Camelbak-style drink system is always helpful when storing water, but a Ziploc bag will work in a pinch and is much more compact. And contrary to what you may have heard, drinking your own urine is a no-no: The benefits are extremely limited, it tastes terrible and people will think you are really strange once you get back to the real world and admit what you've done.
Food
OK, all you eager beavers, it is finally time to go find food. But before you get ahead of yourself, remember: You can go a few weeks without food, and not everything in the woods is safe to eat. Your best bet is to carry a small amount of snacks with you, and survive on these rations until help arrives. Don't go jamming a whole candy bar in your mouth just yet; you could be there for a while! Instead, use careful planning to ration what you have.
Should you find yourself snackless with a growling stomach, you can go out on a limb (not literally) and try to find some edibles that you do recognize, like raspberries or apples. But be sure you know what you are eating before you do take a bite, because you don't want to mistake a cherry tree for a vicious, man-eating plant. If you want to get technical, familiarize yourself with some of the local plants, and determine what is safe to eat. In reality, this step may not need to be too thoroughly explored for off-road riding. Trapped ice-fisherman in Antarctica have been known to eat the leather shoelaces off their boots when stuck in snowdrifts, so if all else fails and you get really hungry, just throw some BBQ sauce on those Alpinestars and dig in! The best bet, provided you have ample water, is to drink enough to keep your appetite at bay.
Following an organized set of priorities won't guarantee your rescue, but it will definitely increase your chances and can make your experience a lot more comfortable. In reality, there is not a whole lot to being a master of survival. All you need is a cool head, a sense of preparedness and the ability to adapt to whatever you're facing. As with anything else, practice makes perfect. So familiarity with these tips and techniques will mean, should you actually need them, you'll be able to react smoothly and confidently and expedite your return to civilization.
If all else fails and the tried-and-true list of survival priorities offers no relief, just paint a face on an volleyball and make a new friend. Hey, it worked for Tom Hanks!
Suggested Survival Kit Contents
1. Signal mirror
2. Whistle
3. Leatherman tool
4. Razor blade
5. Magnesium fire-starter
6. Tinder for fires
7. Strike-anywhere matches
8. Wire saw
9. Magnifying lens
10. Compass
11. Flashlight*
12. Fishing kit
13. Rescue/space blanket
14. Sunscreen*
15. Band-Aids
16. Butterfly wound closure
17. Burn cream
18. Water-purification tablets
19. 2-quart Ziploc bags*
20. Bouillon packet
21. Hard candy
22. Sewing needle
23. Plastic electrical tape
24. Parachute cord
25. Heavy-duty aluminum foil*
26. Dental floss
27. Stainless steel wire
28. Mini carabiner
29. Safety pins
30. Zip-ties
31. Notepad
32. Pencil
33. Map
*not pictured