Nevertheless, the Monkey Butt Dirt Drag is still the biggest event of its kind in the Midwest. The MBAC has classes for every type of four-wheeler and motorcycle made (sorry, no three-wheelers allowed). This means anyone can ride. The course is set up the same as a street drag course except it's shorter than a quarter mile and it's on dirt. You might expect a bunch of redneck cheeseheads at an event such as this, but you're wrong. It isn't a bunch of dudes in overalls getting drunk and seeing how fast their family tractor will go. These racers and their machines are serious. Very serious.
Jim Gnutek races a big yellow modified rig that proudly displays the American flag. The dragster began life as a 600 Ski-Doo. Ten thousand dollars and massive mods have turned the old Ski-Doo into a drag machine. With a crazy gear ratio of 70:14, no shocks and a complete frame rebuild, this is a high-speed racer.
Gnutek's nemesis and friend, Tom Hill, is the man to beat. Hill is considered the fastest man in the world when it comes to quad racing. He has allegedly been clocked at a world record of 172 mph in a 11/48-mile run. Flying this fast on a vehicle with no seat belts has its disadvantages. Hill had a gnarly wreck not too long ago in which he mangled his entire body. This responsible father decided it would be best for his daughter to take his place at the Fudd Run. He took off the nitrous for her in the hopes that she would make it home in one piece so his wife would let him live another day. She had no problems operating the one-cylinder Polaris quad that cranks a little more than 200 horsepower-without the nitrous. (I guess he really does love his daughter.)
The Mud Bog classes are run similarly to the Dirt Drags. Each class takes its turn until there is a winner, and trophies are handed out before moving on to the next class. The races start with the two-wheel-drive sport-type ATV class and progress to the Open class, in which anything goes. The Mud Bog also allows 4x4s to run in two-wheel-drive mode, which makes for some interesting action with large mud tires fighting for traction, causing the front end to dance in the air. The Peewee Mud Bog provides a mini-size pit for young mudders that is just deep enough for them to get a little wet and muddy as with riders in the big pit.
The Off-Road Challenge courses were small but great for novice riders. Even the Advanced Off-Road course seemed simplistic when compared with a hard-core non-manmade course.
The high-end tractor-pulling quads were as modified as-if not more so than-the drags. Massive tires plus heavy horsepower gives you a machine that can outpull a jungle full of monkeys. I never understood why pulling something down a straight line is considered fun, but I did get a few insider tips for anyone who wants to try it. Keep your tires low. Most people drop at least a pound and a half from the rubber doughnuts. Next, try to sneak extra weight on the nose. A true sign of a tractor-pulling amateur is someone who guns it at the start. Don't gun it. All that will do is pile up a bunch of dirt in front of the trailer and stop you immediately. Once you get going off the start, then you can gun it, hot shot. Keep your momentum until you can't go any farther.
If you live within driving range of Janesville and are looking for a family-friendly ATV event to put on your calendar this summer, check out the web site below for details.